Boring, void of direction and lacking the love and compassion I desired.  I went through the motions of each day, went to school and work, paid the bills, watched television and went out occasionally with friends.  My life was full of sadness and anger.  I turned this all inward in an attempt to gain some semblance of control.  I struggled for over a decade with anorexia and bulimia while subjecting myself to physically and emotionally abusive relationships.   I didn’t believe I deserved better and I certainly didn’t believe I could create a different life.

Was there a single event that caused you to leave the life you knew behind and that propelled you into going for your heart’s desires? 

 There are two events in my life that I can point to as being pivotal in propelling me to move in a different direction. The first was the night my then boyfriend of several years told me he was marrying someone else.  That caused me to take a long hard look at the people I was surrounding myself with and decide that I deserved only the best in my life.  At that point, I began to focus on a kind, loving and honest man coming into my life.  What I had not realized was that he was there all along I had just overlooked him, as I was not focused on receiving the good he wanted to share.  In changing my focus, I changed the people in my life and this connected me with my husband, shifting me out of abusive relationships. 

The second event occurred while I was seeking a way to release my dependency upon bulimia.  I became pregnant and in an instant, I realized this was bigger than I was and the Universe was giving me an incredible wake-up call.  I was now responsible for someone other than myself in a way in which I had never experienced before.   My unborn child was 100% dependent upon me.  This shifted my viewpoint from one of selfishness and control to selflessness and loving myself and another human being in a manner in which I had never loved before.  With this shift, I was able to release the illness and move forward into a healthier way of living.  

What is your life like now? 

 I am at peace.  I know who I am and I am comfortable with myself.  I embrace love.  I give and receive compassion, caring, respect and beauty.  Only the important things matter to me.  I get up each morning grateful for another day and ready to contribute to the best of my ability.   I feel it is up to me to make a difference in the world and to encourage others to do the same by following my lead as I follow the lead of those making a difference in front of me.  My time is invested in positive activities: reading, writing, eating healthy, socializing with like-minded individuals, and community.  I release the people and things that attempt to bring drama or negativity into my life.  My boundaries are clear and in setting them, I have found that the people and things I desire to be part of my world, come flooding into my life.   I admit, there are days when challenges arise and my life is far from perfect, but I see these days as reminders that I have a choice to make.  I can either feed into things or redirect my thoughts and actions back onto the path I desire.

How do you balance your work life and home life? 

 It can be challenging to create a balance between the two.  I’m a very visual person and I have found that if I map things out on a calendar, poster board or a dry-erase board, it makes it easier for me to accomplish my goals while still having plenty of time for my family and friends.  I tend to take things in pieces with small chunks making up the whole.  For me, it’s a lot easier to spend 2 hours a day for 4 weeks on a project, than to spend 8 or 10 hours a day on it for a week.  I allow myself reasonable amounts of time and choose not to put myself in a position where the deadline is unreasonable or will cause me to feel stressed or tired.   My husband (a network marketer) works from home and his office is across the hall from mine.  We respect each others appointments and timelines while still setting aside time to be together each day.   I set my schedule so that my work is done by the time my daughter arrives home from school, allowing her and I to have our quality time together without being interrupted by my work commitments.  On days she chooses to play with friends or has an afterschool activity, I use the time to work on pending projects.  This way she feels as if she lead the charge and it was not mommy choosing work instead of being with her.

What would say to someone who has a dream but can’t find time to work on it because he or she is swamped with a job, taking care of an ailing parent, and/or raising children? 

 “Your life is not yet as uncomfortable as it needs to be to drive you to make a change.”  Simple as that.  There is no such thing as a person who does not have the ability to make the time to work on their dream.   If something is really truly important to you, you will find the time to devote to it.  I’ve been there.  I know what it is like to wish there were more hours in the day, to convince yourself that if there were, THEN you’d get the things you were trying to get done, done.  It doesn’t work that way.  Each day has 24 hours and if used properly (based on whatever your schedule is), you can achieve your dream.  The key is that the dream MUST be something that radiates from your heart and soul and that you are willing to give up other things for.   I wrote an article on creating time.  One of the tips I share is to spend a few days mapping out where you are devoting your time and efforts.  Write down everything you do for a 48-72 hour period and it will become apparent to you where you can redirect your energies and create time to focus upon your dream.    Ideas include: cutting back (or out) watching television, getting up 30 minutes earlier or going to be 30 minutes later and spending that time on your dream.  If you work a job with a set lunchtime or break time, close your office door or find a quiet space and use this time to work on your dream.   It’s your dream and no one else is going to invest in you unless you lead the way.   So when you feel a tug in the direction of your dream, open your heart and make way for the road crew to pave the path of your journey.

 What secret do you wish everyone knew? 

 Life is a game full of love, fun and creativity.  The object of the game is to see how excited we can all be to burst out of bed each morning and face the day ready to share our hearts and souls with each other and the world.   I wish people would give themselves the gift of taking care of themselves and allowing themselves to feel good, because when we feel good, it’s contagious!

For more info and to order Caryn’s new ebook (which is amazingly only $9.95) click here: 

http://bit.ly/g7B8MX

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Caryn FitzGerald is a mother, wife, friend, writer, healthy foodist, nature lover, teacher, blogger, entrepreneur, coach, and overall lover of life!  She holds a masters degree and her formal training is as a mental health therapist.  She spent many years working in both the prison system and the community sector assisting those facing challenges on redirecting their lifes path. Caryn has been writing in several genres for over thirty years.  Some of her recent work includes: “Tulips in the Sand: A Riley Matthews Mystery” and “Fish Sticks, Books and Blue Jeans – Teaching kids to be thankful for everything (yes, even Fish Sticks) everyday!” which she co-authored with her daughter, Sami.  

Her belief is that a full, abundant life can be created and enjoyed regardless of one’s past. 

Today she enjoys the blessings of playing from home as a writer & speaker, fulfilling her passions by assisting others in learning the techniques required to create the life of their dreams. 

Blog: http://www.EmbracingMyJourney.com

Website: http://www.CarynFitzgerald.com